Archive for December, 2010

Where are they Wednesdays? Kim Darby (Vampire Justin Bieber?)

  • Written by Jason
  • Posted December 29, 2010 at 10:33 am

Hey everyone!  You’re ol’ pal Nate missed his date with Destiny last week and there was no Holiday edition of Where Are They Wednesday!  You see, I had a very large Christmas list and many gifts to buy.  Who would have known the shopping malls were that busy that close to Christmas?  They were Ho-Ho-rendous!  I did have some time to read Jason’s review of the original True Grit over shortly after it was posted, thanks to the wonderful technology known as an Ipad and a subscription to BoxOfficeBoredom.com in my feed reader.  If you haven’t done it- subscribe!  It’s easy.

As I was reading over all the reasons The Duke wanted to punch people in the face, I started noticing one of the pictures that Jason had used.    I looked, once, twice and then did a double take.  Could it be Justin Bieber in a film from 1969?  It turns out that many claim this person is actress Kim Darby, the young, bossy starlet of True Grit but who are we kidding- she’s found the fountain of youth and is singing “One Less Lonely Girl” today!

Turns out Kim Darby, whom John Wayne stated was one of the worst actresses he ever worked with continued down the acting career path.  While she never exactly struck it big, Darby made appearances in films like the 80’s Cusack classic, Better Off Dead and a string of TV movies and TV appearances.  Maybe The Duke was right, because while Darby had a steady stream of work, she never quite became a super starlet and household name.  She did receive a Golden Globe nomination for her work in Generation, but never made it into the Oscar ranks.

Now what exactly is Ms. Darby up to now days?  Darby teaches acting and does acting seminars at local universities in the California area.  She’s been doing them since the 90’s.  She also still makes a few bit appearances in some low budget indie films now and then.  However its been 2007 since we have last seen her grace the screen.  I can’t help but chuckle and think that John Wayne must be rolling in his grave thinking about Darby teaching people to act.

While the above where abouts seem logical, it should be noted that I don’t have the same belief.  You see, I enjoy a great deal of vampire flicks and the one thing I have noticed is that vampires don’t age.  I think shortly after wrapping True Grit, John Wayne (who at this time had been turned to a blood sucker) bit Darby in a fit of rage.  Darby consequently turned into a vampire as well.  Both went their separate ways.  Legend states that The Duke died of cancer 10 years later but it was most likely the work of someone like Blade, Abe Lincoln or one of those other vampire hunters.

Miss Darby found that she could not age and passed her stage name onto some other similar looking young starlet in hopes that she would carry on her legacy.  The real Darby retreated into the shadows and began feeding off human blood.  It wasn’t until she had fully realized that the “new” Kim Darby had squandered away her “fame” that the real Darby (still very young looking) re-invented herself and became- Justin Bieber.

That’s right folks, Kim Darby could be teaching acting at an old age, or is a vampire and posing as Justin Bieber.  Now there’s some food for thought.  ”One Less Lonely Girl” is really just a song about the Bieber stalking and drinking the blood of Bieber fans.  But then again what do I know?  Believe what ever you want, but that should sum up this edition of Where Are They? Wednesday.  This is Nate Grenbeck saying, Good night and good luck.

No Comments
Filed under: Articles

4 Evil Monkeys, and Merry Christmas to All!

  • Written by Jason
  • Posted December 23, 2010 at 2:13 pm

BoxOfficeBoredom.com’s good friend and reviewer, The Mike has a great  website called From Midnight With Love, where he talks horror and cult classic films.  I’ve always been a huge fan of The Mike, he’s one of my good friends and favorite movie buffs to hang out with.

Recently The Mike has been celebrating the 12 Midnights of Christmas with his readers, celebrating each day with a different horror theme.  Despite not being a horror expert, I was asked to partake in this venture.  With 4 days to Christmas left, I embarked on a mission to find 4 Primate Packed flicks that would have you shivering this holiday season.  If you’d like to read some monkey madness, check out From Midnight With Love, and check out 4 Evil Monkeys!

The next few days will be filled with Holiday fun, so posting over the weekend will be few.   Merry Christmas to all from Jason, Nate, The Mike and every other contributor to BoxOfficeBoredom.com over the last 10 years!

No Comments
Filed under: Articles

Definition of True Grit: Not getting punched by The Duke

  • Written by Jason
  • Posted at 2:01 pm

For those of you who are looking forward to a review of the new Cohen Brothers collaboration, True Grit, that opened in theaters yesterday, I am sad to report that you just might be waiting a bit longer.  With Oscar buzz swarming around the film, people are calling it one of the must see movies this holiday season.  Funny how that works out, because when the film was first announced people couldn’t loathe the idea any more.  There are rules in Hollywood, and sometimes those rules interfere with one another.  One of those rules is everything deserves a sequel or reboot.  The second rule is don’t anger “The Duke.”

John Wayne, better known to Hollywood as “The Duke” mad a Hollywood career making movies.  Known for his rough and tough swagger, The Duke is probably the most recognizable person in American westerns to date, and probably of all time.  His no nonsense delivery and approach to the movies made him an instant star that many have tried to emulate and few will ever achieve.  It was  in 1969 that Wayne found himself racking up Oscar buzz for a film called True Grit, in which he played a rough around the edges US Marshal, Rooster Cogburn.  Cogburn has a reputation of being a sour ol’ man who always gets his man, and finds himself under the employment of a strong willed, sassy, 16 year old girl who is seeking to avenge her father’s death.  Despite Wayne’s illustrious career on the silver screen, True Grit may be the film he is most remembered for and rightfully so.  After all it did win him an Oscar.

True Grit has all the makings of a “wonder years” of Hollywood type film.  Wayne swaggers his way on screen and reads off his lines  with the acting prowess that made him the acting juggernaut that he once was.  Wayne has a certain charsima that makes you want to love the actor, and want more of him on screen.  Oddly enough though, The Duke would be like a fish out of water in modern day Hollywood.  Something about Wayne defines an era, but at the same time he’d stick out like a sore thumb now days.  Now, I’m not saying he’s the Paul Walker or Channing Tatum of cinema, but I just don’t feel as though the modern day generation would gravitate around the man if he was making movies in this millennium.   That shouldn’t come as that much of a surpise.  After all- wasn’t it box office star Will Smith that ushered us into the “Willennium” in the late 90’s?  As cool of a cat as The Duke is, he can’t get jiggy with the Fresh Prince can he?

Perhaps what stands out the most to me about True Grit is Kim Darby, the actress who plays Maddie Ross.  Ross is the 16 year old girl that tags along with Rooster seeking revenge.  No matter how much you can love a free spirited, strong willed girl, Maddie Ross is the type of character you just couldn’t help but want to punch in the nose.  Mind you, I’ve never wanted, or even felt the need to punch a girl; but there were those moments I had thought maybe- just maybe- it wouldn’t be so bad if The Duke popped her in the nose.  I’m sure Kim Darby was told to play Maddie with such force, after all it’s hard to believe anyone like Rooster would give her the time of day otherwise.  None the less it was very hard to stay in the film when all you kept thinking about was how annoying that girl was.  It’s kind of like watching a Kathryn Hiegl film; no matter how much fun you are having with any of her mindless flicks, you still can’t stop thinking about how much she annoys you.  Yeah—annoys me…that was the word I was looking for.  I’ll save my crass Kathryn Heigl words for another day.

It turns out that in real life, real life Rooster Cogburn (Wayne) just might have had half a mind to do just that to his co-star Kim Darby.  Wayne initially wanted his daughter in the role, but the studios eventually settled on Darby.  Wayne didn’t hide the fact on set that he hated working with the young actress, and the two rarely spoke to each other on set.  Wayne felt as though she was an unprofessional actress and was later on quoted saying, “Talk about having no chemistry with your leading lady! She was the goddamn lousiest actress I ever worked with.”

The Duke’s sour attitude didn’t stop at Darby.  He also had little time for Robert Duvall, who took on the role of outlaw Ned Pepper.  Duvall, who even in 1969 was sporting less hair than he probably preferred at that age, proves to be a worthy advesary to Rooster Cogburn in the film.  Duvall’s straight method acting counter’s Wayne’s hammed up, over the top performance and in many ways comes out to being a more genuine character for the little screen time he has.  Off camera, Rooster and Pepper were also fixin’ for a fight as Wayne made it perfectly clear that he wasn’t pleased with Duvall’s methods.   In fact, The Duke threatened to punch out Duvall if he argued with the director on set.

As I look back on True Grit, it’s a film that I had a lot of fun with, but Wayne is way over the top and Darby irritated me beyond all belief.  Despite that being a huge thing to over come, the film is a classic that is worth checking out.   In the film Maddie Ross keeps saying she is looking for a man with “True Grit” to avenge her father.  On screen “True Grit” is personified in Rooster Cogburn.  Off screen, when the camera’s weren’t rolling it sounds like “True Grit” was simply not getting punched out by a cranky old Duke.

As the holidays roll around, I’m kind of excited to see what the Cohens have done with True Grit.  They’ve taken a classic film and gave it a darker twist.  I see  trailers with Jeff “The Dude” Bridges and can’t wait to see his version of Cogburn on screen.  The original True Grit is a classic, but this is one “remake” that just might have the grit to rival it’s predecessor.

1 Comment
Filed under: Movies, Western

I don’t have to be a Toys R Us Kid, but do I have to hang out with them?

  • Written by Jason
  • Posted December 20, 2010 at 9:20 am

It was Billy Madison who once told a kid that he didn’t want to grow up. “Don’t you say that. Don’t you ever say that. Stay here. Stay here as long as you can. For the love of God, cherish it. You have to cherish it.” So were the wise words of Billy Madison, aka Adam Sandler way back in the year 1995.  While Billy Madison and Happy Gilmore put Sandler on the map his latest films have made him just next to yesterday’s news. Within the last week I learned that if my life will emulate Adam Sandler’s career I don’t ever want to become a “Grown Up.”

Grown Ups is the latest attempt at comedy from Adam Sandler and friends.  Pooling together resources from the stars of yesterday, Sandler teams up with Rob Schnieder, Chris Rock, David Spade and Kevin James to create a family friendly film about 5 friends who went their separate ways but rekindle their friendships at a weekend retreat.  As a kid I was always reminded of common place TV jingle: “I don’t wanna grow up, I just wanna be a Toys R Us Kid!”  As I look back now, I don’t even care if I’m a Toys R Us kid, I just don’t want to hang around these old guys ever again!

Great comedy is about timing, and this film certainly lacks timing.  The jokes fall flat fast, and drag on forever.  We find Sandler and company trying to drain every ounce out of each one liner until there is nothing left, all while remaining kid tested and mother approved.  For a mere 90 minutes I starred at a screen trying to tolerate the on screen antics of these 5 funny men and left the film feeling like I had just ended a 3 hour epic instead.   Yes Adam, we get it- your kids are spoiled brats and you’re wife if a high maintenance pain. Yes, Chris Rock your wife is an angry black woman.  Yes, Rob Schneider, you’re dating a creepy old lady.  David Spade, you are a creeper, we get it!  And Kevin James, you just wanna be one of the boys.  You’re the fat guy who steps in when Chris Farley dies.  Cool.  Can we move on now?

Drudging the bottom of the barrel with fat jokes, fart jokes and other mediocre humor, Grown Ups tries every trick in the book to keep families laughing.  While the kids might have a good time, it’s the grown up viewers that will be begging for this film to end.  In fact, as these 5 comedians tried to talk about the good ol days on screen it made me actually dread the day I become “old.”  I actually thought back and relived my entire childhood 8 times throughout the film, just so I could have a break from this painfully unfunny flick.

I could keep going on with example after example of why someone should avoid the film Grown Ups much like the plague, but I’d be giving you extra reading material on a film that doesn’t deserve the film it’s printed on let alone web space devoted to it.  The only thing Grown Ups did for me is make me nostalgically wish for a time when Sandler and company were funny again.  In previous reviews I lied Mr. Sandler.  I asked for you to grow out of saying “abbey doobie” and push your comedy to new limits.  Now I beg you to retreat back to it before you take all of your friends down with you.  You once were a comedy juggernaut, but you’re quickly becoming the washed up quarterback of comedy.  Prove it to us that you still have it in you!  Prove me wrong- just don’t make a sequel to Grown Ups.

No Comments
Filed under: Comedy, Movies

Trash, Treasure, Midgets and Mayhem

  • Written by Mattvw
  • Posted December 18, 2010 at 9:24 am

Guest TV Review by Matt VW

What do you get when you take the hit TV shows Pawn Stars and American Pickers? The answer my friends is the newest A&E show, Storage Wars.

Let me first explain how I came across this show. I was surfing the OnDemand feature on my TV and came across some free TV episodes. I saw that A&E had some shows with free episodes and Storage Wars caught my eye. I’m a big fan of American Pickers, so with some time on my hands I figured I would give this show a look.

The show follows four very “unique” guys that buy abandoned storage units. Basically if someone does not pay the rent on his or her storage unit, the storage company will auction it off to these buyers, with all your stuff in them. Here comes the interesting part.

Once they have broken the locks off, the buyers only get 5 minutes to look at the unit and can only look at it from the front. No walking inside and rummaging through everything. Fun job right? It’s essentially like gambling. The guys on the show even say it’s an addiction. One day you might hit it big and find something extremely valuable like a gold necklace and another day you come up short with nothing, well that is if you find a duffel bag full of dildos nothing. But I’ll let you be the judge of that.

Like I mentioned earlier, the show follows four guys throughout each episode and give you an insight into what exactly they do.

Darrell Sheets is the intimidating one. He reminds me of Paul Teutul Sr. minus the sweet handle bar mustache. He is the most experienced guy out there but is a little slow between the ears.

Jarrod Schulz always seems to come up short every episode. His wife, who is also his partner at his thrift shop, comes along on all of the auctions and is constantly breathing down his neck and in his ear after every bid he makes. She loves him when he gets lucky on a unit and hates him when he doesn’t.

Dave Hester is the guy everyone loves to hate on the show. Dave always goes for the big units, and when he sees a unit he doesn’t want but knows somebody else wants, he tries to run the price up on them. He’s a jerk, but probably the most successful bidder out there. He is not there to make friends with anyone that’s for sure.

Last but not least there is Barry Weiss. Barry will pull out every trick in the book to try and get the upper hand on a unit. Even if it means using night vision goggles, or hiring a midget so he can have an advantage to see down below. He is new to the game and makes a lot of rookie mistakes, but he knows a little bit about a lot of stuff which at times gives him an advantage.

When the bidding begins, the auctioneer, Dan, takes you for a ride with the traditional auction chant, speaking at a rate you can barely understand. The bidding wars get very intense and in the 100 degree Southern California weather, tempers flare.

At the end of the day, the guys go back and get a chance to look at what they bought. The reveals can be very exciting when they come across something big. You never know what they are going to find. The units usually sell for about $300 to up to at least $3000 depending on how big the unit is or what they can see from plain view.

For me what makes this show so entertaining is how quirky and strange all these people are. They are a breed of their own. It is a risky business to get into simply because everything is a gamble. At the end, they reveal how much profit each buyer made on the unit and I have seen as much as $40,000 profit on one unit alone.

I’m actually surprised that more people don’t get into this business. I don’t think I could ever do what they do just because I would feel bad about taking somebody’s stuff. A lot of the valuable stuff they find are big collections (cards, coins, records, jewelry) that took people a lifetime to collect. I guess you would have to be pretty selfish to want to do what these guys do. But that’s just my opinion.

I encourage you to give this show a try. I went in with low expectations and after watching one episode I find myself watching the newest episodes on A&E every Wednesday at 9:00pm.

“It’s get rich or die buyin,” ok don’t let their cheesy slogan stop you from watching.

Go watch Storage Wars!

Matt is has been a regular guest on our podcast in the past and is a fellow movie and TV addict.  You can read Matt’s ramblings that are not movie related on his blog, My Life as a College Student

No Comments
Filed under: TV
?>