Archive for August, 2010

Everyone Says I Love You

  • Written by Jason
  • Posted August 28, 2010 at 12:40 pm

A Review by Jason
Starring: Woody Allen, Alan Alda, Drew Barrymore, Edward Norton
Directed by: Woody Allen
Rated: R
Movie Released: 1996
IMDB Link

I  finally caught this 1996 Woody Allen flick the other day after years of putting it off.  Nothing about the flick trulyhad me excited about it, except the names Woody Allen and Edward Norton.  I had heard some mediocre to awful things about the flick and was even told that it’s a film that is best left forgotten.   But I thought to myself, it can’t be that bad as I the opening credits rolled.

Allen’s Everyone Says I Love You is a musical about love, and the complications of love.  It’s a neurotic story of how one family deals with falling in and out of love and then back in again.  It’s a tale that comments on the facade we put up as we fall in love to impress one another, not letting our true selves show.  All this wonderful neurotic commentary is set upon a musical backdrop.  That’s right folks, it’s a Woody Allen musical.

Norton breaking into song and dance

Featuring all the actors original singing voices, Everyone Says I Love You was not originally sold a a musical to the cast.  In fact, Allen “neglected” to tell them it was a musical until they all signed on.  Only then did the cast find out that the New York based love story would feature the singing talents of Woody Allen, Edward Norton, Alan Alda, Julia Roberts and Drew Barrymore along with others.  The amateur singing actually makes the musical portion of the film to be more raw and realistic, however it is very hard to make any musical seem realistic.  Very few times can someone break into a song and dance number in real life situations and be seen as normal.  Each of the actors doing a fine job of humming the bars to the songs, but something still seems out of place.

That out of place moment I believe lies in the characters.  In many Allen films, Woody himself takes the role as the neurotic bumbling, enlightened buffoon, however he in Everyone Says I Love You the film takes a different twist.  Allen still plays the bumbling buffoon, also known as the only character he knows how to play (and the man Michael Cera wishes he could channel),  but many of the other characters in the film share his wishy washy absurdities.  It’s because of this that I had a very hard time relating to these characters.  When you have a movie that is going to break out into song and dance at every possible occasion, you need to have a cast of characters that you care about.  Unfortunately in Everyone Says I Love You, every character just grates on your nerves.

Filled with songs that lack a punch or substance, Allen’s film fails as a musical.  There really isn’t a catchy enough tune to get people to remember the film, and the film reeks as a lack luster throwback to the musicals of old.  Complete with a song themed to Halloween, and another that features dancing ghosts at a funeral parlor, Allen in many ways seems to be trying too hard to make something special.  The only enjoyment I found out of this film was to see how many times Allen found ways to mention how wonderful New York is, a trend that is a staple in every one of his flicks.

When it was all said and done, I was more than happy to see the end credits roll on this flick.  I’ve finally found a Woody Allen film that I really found little to no enjoyment in.  Sorry folks, but this is a musical that is best left forgotten.

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Filed under: Movies, Musical

Where have you been BoxOfficeBoredom?

  • Written by Jason
  • Posted August 27, 2010 at 3:23 pm

Adoring fans have been asking where exactly have I been lately?  Well truth be told, the fans haven’t been asking, but I figured I owed my readers a bit of an explanation.

Let’s first track all the way back to the end of May 2010.  I contracted something that I have come to claim as “BieberFever” even though it has nothing to do with Justin Bieber.  This sickness was a fun flu like symptom that drug on for a few weeks.  It was a nice cross between mono and food poisoning mixed in with the constant string of migraines my body has blessed me with on a constant basis.  During the “Bieber Fever” days I really had no interest in much of anything, let alone writing about films, and it looks like my partner in crime, Nate Grenbeck, didn’t really pick up the ball and run with it.

June became a very busy time at work, mostly playing catch up from Bieber Fever and an increase of operation hours and business in general.  I found myself enjoying a lot more television shows and kind of tuned out the movie world.  Deadliest Catch became a familliar friend of mine and I sat on the couch eating cheesy poofs and thinking that it would be really cool to be on “The Time Bandit” fishing for crab.   Side note: Have you ever made it through a day without seeing or hearing Mike Rowe’s voice on TV?  I don’t know if I have in the last few years now that I think about it.  That dude is everywhere!

July, well July I have no excuse.  I even watched Despicable Me, but for some reason didn’t feel the need to share my viewpoint with you.  (By the way, it get’s a thumbs up!).  I ventured into the land ofVampire and Werewolves and saw Eclipse.  I still of course am a true believer that Bella should have chosen Mike Newton.  After all, as a male, human it is my belief that them werewolves and vampires should stop stealin’ our womens (even if it is Kristen Stewart).    Alas, no review.  If I can blame July on anything, I’ll try and blame it on a cluster of migraines that felt like I was being hit on the head with a tack hammer for a few hours, roughly 4-5 times a week.

August kicked off with me still following my regimine of 4-5 migraines a day and preventative meds that helped even less.  Nate Grenbeck, again didn’t step up to the plate (but rumor has it he did watch Step Up 3-D and now believes everything you need to know about him, you can learn from his dancing).  Quitting the meds cold turkey may have been dumb, but hey what do I know?  I found myself exploring some other weirdo ways of dealing with migraines, one of them being accupuncture and discovering that Vick’s Vapo Rub on your forehead makes a very neat soothing sensation on your head that helps aleviate pain.  While I am still unsure if being poked with needles is fun, I have had a few less headaches.  Time will tell if poking me with things is helping.

I’ve been reliving MacGyver, Walker Texas Ranger and even seen more episodes of American Chopper than I care to comment on.  I’ve been watching Lie To Me on Fox, American Pickers and Pawn Stars on History Channel, and even taken in a few ball games.  I recently captured the autograph of my childhood hero, Ryne Sandberg, at a local Iowa Cubs game which will most likely spawn an entire article some day on why autograph hunters have actually corrupted the spirit of the game.  Oh…and I watched They Live.  Enjoy the review.

There we go…That pretty much brings us up to date.  That’s where I’ve been.  What have you been up to? And why haven’t you been pestering me for more insight in my absence?

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Filed under: Articles

They Live

  • Written by Jason
  • Posted at 2:48 pm

A Review by Jason
Starring: Roddy Piper, Keith David
Directed by: John Carpenter
Rated: R
Movie Released: 1988
IMDB Link

No one expects a master of horror to make a film that has any true cultural meaning to it. If you ask any zombie loving, blood lusting, thrill seeking horror geek what the true meaning behind any horror film is, I know for a fact that they can contrive some deep meaning out of even the likes of Saw 3-D. But the truth of the matter is, you can make anything seem worth while and meaningful (except Juwanna Mann). In 1988 director John Carpenter set out to make a B movie thriller filled full of social commentary that few saw, and aside from the cult status it has gained in some circles even fewer remember.

They Live is Carpenter’s delve into the “big brother is watching” syndrome that we all fear even to this day, and foreshadows society’s inability to see the big picture. Drawing deep into the well and scraping the near bottom of the surface, Carpenter reels in former pro wrestler, “Hot Rod” Rowdy Roddy Piper as the film’s star. Piper stars as a lone drifter who stumbles upon a pair of sunglasses that allow him to uncover an alien conspiracy. Using subliminal mind control devices and living and working amongst us, these intelligent beings have found a way to control the human race and convince them that they don’t exist. However, now armed with the truth, it is up to Piper to be one of mankind’s saviors.

On a surface level, we can find They Live to be just another sci-fi thriller of the ages. It’s got a straight forward plot, a low rent cast warning of alien enslavement and some cheap special effects. In other words, it has all the cheese of a B movie that you would normally skip right over. Aside from the cult status it has achieved, They Live is generally over looked as something to check out on the average movie goer’s must see list. I on the other hand, put it on any one’s list as a film to check out in your lifetime.

The film is a social commentary on how people like to live in blindness, and mocks the old saying, “what I don’t know doesn’t hurt me.” In perhaps it’s most mocking scene the film spends 6 minutes focusing on an alleyway fight scene between Roddy Piper and Kieth David. Replicated in episodes of South Park in the famous “Cripple Fight” episode, one can look at this scene as a pointless nothing fight to enhance the film’s action sequences. However the scene holds a deeper meaning. This 6 minute struggle, where Piper tries to beat David into submission until he puts on the glasses, is actually a commentary on the daily struggles people have with others. No matter what the cause, we find ourselves fighting one another to see things our way. While we may not be physically beating someone into submission, we do find ourselves going to battle daily for our causes.  David’s character likes to live in the dark, he’d rather keep his head down and work hard. As he states, “I’ve walked a white line my entire life, I’m not about to screw that up.” Too many times, we don’t question what we don’t understand, and we don’t listen to the alternative point of view. We are like sheep, blindly following because we don’t want to draw attention to ourselves. And then there are people like Piper’s character who say “The white line is the middle of the road, and that’s the worst place to drive.” He’s not afraid to be inquisitive and to see the world for what it really is.

Carpenter’s film is first and foremost a tale of corporate greed and corporate culture and how we all become willingslaves to it without really even knowing.  Sure the film has aliens that can only be seen with x-ray specs, but if you see only the surface level, you are missing the point. The “aliens” controlling the show, are corporate elitists, convincing you to “buy. consume, obey, and stay asleep.” As long as we do these things, they are still in power. It’s scary to think, but 22 years ago Carpenter was making a social commentary on some of the very challenges that we face today. Politicians hope we remain apathetic and disengaged, so they can stay in power and “fundamentally change” the United States. Corporations hope that we don’t see through the complete idiocy of advertising campaigns and the “I need that!” culture we live in. We don’t need that new car with a spoiler that doubles as a helicopter, but we think we do. Our shampoo doesn’t need extra proteins and vitamins (after all, hair doesn’t absorb proteins), but we think we do. The corporate culture has us enslaved in this must have environment. It’s our role to obey and not question it.

As the Dow continues to fall, and people are daily beginning to question our leaders actions the messages in film like They Live continue to become more and more relavant. If you haven’t had a chance to check out this Carpenter classic, check it out. If you’re one of those people who would rather not “put on the glasses” don’t watch it for social commentary, just watch it for some good old fashioned B movie fun. Engulf yourself in the cheese known as Roddy Piper one liners such as “I have come here to chew bubble gum and kick ass, and I’m all out of gum.” (which was later stolen for the 90’s classic video game, Duke Nukem) and ” I’m giving you a choice: either put on these glasses or start eatin’ that trash can. “

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Filed under: Cult, Horror, Movies, Science Fiction
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